Top Ten Reasons Why Gays Should Be in Charge of the Military

A response to the comments of Marine Gen. Peter Pace: Top Ten Reasons Why Gays Should Be in Charge of the Military

10: Color coordinated uniforms

9: Quiche based MREs

8: Stock prices for retailers such as Banana Republic and Abercrombie & Fitch would get a boost from government contracts

7: Marching would be more fun to a Techno beat

6: Oil independance would finally become a reality when those gas guzzling Hummers are traded in for shiny new hybrids

5: General Jack McFarland and Major Mango

4: The Village People would finally get respect when contracted to write songs for the other branches of the armed forces

3: Who needs napalm when you are already flaming?

2: Not only would they shame those dirty Talibans by making them shave their beards but also dress nicer and get highlights

And the number 1 reason why gays should be in charge of the military:

Wars would no longer be decided by bomb or bullet, but by who has the meanest bitch slap!